Okay so Ling is born in 1982 in Shenzhen, China. You know Shenzhen? Is where ALL the photocopier come from. Seriously, you throw rock in Shenzhen, you hit photocopier factory. You throw another rock, you hit different photocopier factory. Is basically Copier City over there.

Ling mother work in copier factory. Ling father work in copier factory. Ling grandmother? She work in DIFFERENT copier factory. Is family business, except family not own business, family just work in many business that all make same thing.

When Ling mother is pregnant with Ling, she work quality control on Ricoh assembly line. She checking drum unit, she checking fuser, she checking paper tray ALL DAY. Doctor say "Mrs Chen, maybe you take break, baby coming soon." Ling mother say "Baby can wait, this C4500 not going to inspect itself."

So Ling is born surrounded by gentle hum of photocopier. First thing baby Ling hear is not mother singing lullaby — is sound of 45 page per minute duplex printing. Very soothing actually. To this day, Ling cannot sleep without white noise machine that sound like paper feeding through document feeder.

📸 ACTUAL PHOTO OF BABY LING WITH FIRST COPIER! 📸

(Look at tiny Ling! Already know how to hold toner cartridge! Already wearing work uniform with name tag! Already surrounded by printed document! This baby going places!)

Other children in Ling neighbourhood, they do normal children thing. They play game, they chase each other, they do homework (SO MUCH HOMEWORK in China, you have no idea, Ling do homework until midnight every night, this is not joke, Chinese education system is INTENSE).

But Ling? Ling not interested in normal thing.

Ling father bring home broken copier from factory — machine that fail quality control, destined for scrap heap. Other father bring son football. Ling father bring son broken Konica Minolta.

Ling LOVE this copier. Ling name it "Little Brother" even though is massive office machine that take up half of tiny apartment. Ling mother not happy. Ling mother say "Why our living room smell like toner?" Ling say "THAT IS SMELL OF POTENTIAL, MOTHER."

By age seven, Ling memorise every service code for Canon iR series. Other kids memorise time table. Ling memorise error code. E001? Fuser temperature problem. E007? Fixing film damage. E602? Main motor not working. Ling know all this before Ling know how to ride bicycle. Ling still not know how to ride bicycle actually. Never needed. Copier don't require bicycle.

Ling frame this report. Is on Ling wall right now. Teacher not understand that Ling was AHEAD OF TIME.

Okay so here is thing people always ask Ling: "Ling, how you end up in United Kingdom? Is very far from Shenzhen."

And Ling always say same thing:

Is true! Think about it. Every copier in your office — where it come from? CHINA. Where Ling come from? CHINA. Copier get put in container, go on big ship, travel across ocean, arrive in UK, get unpacked, start working. Ling do exact same thing except Ling take airplane instead of container ship because Ling get claustrophobic and also container ship not have toilet.

Ling arrive at Heathrow Airport in January 2005. Is FREEZING. Ling from Shenzhen where winter mean "maybe wear light jacket." UK winter mean "question all life choice while waiting for bus that never come."

Ling have job waiting — position at copier dealership in Milton Keynes. You know Milton Keynes? Is very... round. So many roundabout. Ling get lost seventeen time on first day because EVERYTHING LOOK SAME and GPS keep saying "take third exit" but which exit is third exit when you going around in circle?? British road design make no sense to Ling.

Ling live in small room above kebab shop. Very small. Ling could touch both wall at same time if Ling stretch arm. But Ling not complain because Ling have DREAM. Dream of helping British business find perfect copier. Dream sound stupid when Ling say out loud but dream keep Ling warm at night. Dream and also kebab smell from downstairs which never go away, not even when Ling wash clothes, everything Ling own smell like lamb for three years.

Year 2010. Ling working for big copier company. Going to customer site for routine service. Customer is small accountant office in Watford. Lady name Barbara is office manager.

Ling walk in and Barbara is CRYING.

Not like small cry. Like big cry. Like "life is falling apart" cry. Ling panic. Ling not good with crying. Ling usually deal with machine, machine don't cry, machine just beep angrily and Ling fix them.

"What wrong??" Ling ask, very concern.

"It's the copier," Barbara sob. "The salesman said it perfect for us. He said 45 page per minute plenty. He said monthly volume fine. BUT LOOK AT US LING. LOOK AT THE QUEUE."

Ling look. Queue for copier is longer than queue at post office. And queue at British post office is LEGENDARY.

Ling examine machine. Is tiny desktop copier. Made for maybe 5,000 page per month. Barbara accountant firm is pushing 50,000 page per month during tax season.

"Who sell you this?" Ling ask, eye narrowing like detective in crime drama.

"Very nice man in suit. He have lovely teeth."

AND THEN LING UNDERSTAND.

Lovely Teeth Man not care about Barbara. Lovely Teeth Man care about COMMISSION. Lovely Teeth Man sell Barbara machine that make Lovely Teeth Man most money, not machine that Barbara actually need. Lovely Teeth Man probably win sales award while Barbara cry into her Nescafé.

Something snap in Ling that day. Like toner cartridge breaking open and covering everything in fine black powder, except is Ling heart breaking open and covering everything in RIGHTEOUS FURY.

Barbara stop crying. Ling get her proper machine at fair price. Ling become her hero. Barbara send Ling Christmas card every year now. Card always say "Thank you for saving us from Lovely Teeth Man." Ling keep all card. Ling have whole drawer of Barbara card.

March 2015. Ling have enough saving from working for other people. Ling have enough knowledge from thirty year of copier experience. Ling have ENOUGH of watching Lovely Teeth Men rip off innocent business owner with overpriced machine and sneaky contract.

So Ling build website. LingsCopiers.com.

See, copier industry is MESS. Price all over the place. Same machine cost £3,000 from one dealer, £7,000 from another dealer, £5,000 from third dealer but with sneaky maintenance contract that cost extra £200 per month for seven year. How business owner supposed to know what is fair price? They not copier expert! They busy running business! They not have time to learn about cost-per-page and duty cycle and fuser life expectancy!

But Ling? Ling know EVERYTHING about copier price. Ling know what dealer pay. Ling know what fair markup is. Ling know which contract is good deal and which contract is TRAP. Ling know this because Ling spend entire life learning this while normal people learn normal thing like how to make friend and ride bicycle.

So Ling put all this knowledge on website. Business owner come to Ling, tell Ling what they need, and Ling help them find best copier at best price. Ling compare deal from different supplier. Ling read the small print so business owner don't have to. Ling make sure nobody get ripped off by Lovely Teeth Man ever again.

Now, some people say Ling website look like "explosion in clip art factory." Some people say is "what happen when 1997 internet eat too much sugar and have panic attack." Some people say "Ling, why there is animated gif of copier doing Macarena? Why Ling face is on Mona Lisa body? Why so many flashing thing?"

And Ling say: EXACTLY.

You go to boring copier website, what you see? Stock photo of person in suit shaking hand. Blue and grey colour scheme because is "professional." Lots of word like "synergy" and "solution" and "paradigm" that mean nothing. Is same as every other copier website. Is FORGETTABLE.

You go to Ling website, you REMEMBER. Maybe you remember because you have headache now. Maybe you remember because you cannot stop seeing Ling face everywhere. But you REMEMBER. And when you need copier at good price, whose name pop into your head?

LING.

This is what Ling call "Marketing Genius." Some people call it "Assault on the senses." Tomato, tomahto.

When you come to Ling for copier help, Ling not just find you machine. Ling find you BEST DEAL. Ling ask question that nobody else ask:

After Ling understand your business, THEN Ling find you best deal. Ling compare price from multiple supplier. Ling calculate total cost of ownership over five year including toner, maintenance, everything. Ling make sure you not sign contract with horrible small print.

LING CAN IDENTIFY ANY TONER BY SMELL.

Is true. People not believe Ling until Ling demonstrate. You put blindfold on Ling, you open toner cartridge near Ling nose, Ling tell you exactly what brand is.

At trade show one time, Ling identify 12 toner in row blindfolded. Crowd go wild. Well, crowd politely clap because is British crowd, but for British that IS going wild.

Toner number 13 was trick — was actually coffee. Ling sniff and say "This is Colombian medium roast, slightly over-extracted, and INSULT to Ling ability. Why you waste Ling time with coffee? Ling here for TONER."

Crowd definitely go wild after that. One person even say "well done." From British person this basically like getting standing ovation.

Okay so Ling staff say Ling is weird because Ling talk to copier.

But listen — you spend 30 year with machine, you start to understand them. You learn their personality. You know when they happy, when they sad, when they feeling unappreciated because stupid human use wrong paper weight and cause jam.

Just last week, Ling working on beautiful Konica Minolta C558. Previous owner use cheap third-party toner. Machine was SUFFERING. Print quality terrible. Colour registration off. Fuser making sad noise.

So yes, Ling apologise to machine. Ling say "Ling is sorry they do this to you. You deserve better. You deserve genuine supplies and proper service contract. Ling going to take care of you now."

Staff think Ling is crazy. But you know what? After Ling replace toner, clean fuser, run calibration — machine work PERFECT. Better than before. Like machine know Ling care.

Is same with people actually. Huh. Ling just have philosophical moment. Anyway—

Ling keep mental list of COPIER CRIME AGAINST HUMANITY:

Look, Ling know copier not most exciting thing in world. Nobody wake up in morning and say "Oh boy, today I get to think about document output solution!" Copier is boring. Copier is background thing. Copier is machine that sit in corner and you ignore until it break.

But here is truth:

Every contract you print. Every invoice you copy. Every proposal that win you big client. Every report that keep your boss happy. All of this come from copier. Copier work hard every day and ask for nothing except toner and paper and occasionally someone to clear jam from tray 3.

Copier deserve RESPECT. Copier deserve to be chosen with CARE. And your business deserve GOOD PRICE, not rip-off price from Lovely Teeth Man who disappear after sale and never answer phone again.

This is what Ling do. This is why Ling build website. To help business get good copier at good price without getting ripped off. Not to make Ling rich (Ling accountant confirm Ling terrible at getting rich). Not to become famous (although Ling face on Mona Lisa is pretty nice). But to make sure every business — big, small, medium, tiny, huge — get fair deal.

Because Ling believe in something. Ling believe in COPIER JUSTICE.

Is that weird? Maybe that weird. Ling don't care. Ling been weird whole life. Weird work out okay for Ling so far.

So now you know story of Ling. Boy from Shenzhen who grow up surrounded by copier. Man who shipped to UK like the machine he love. Entrepreneur who build website to help business get good price on copier because Ling HATE seeing people get ripped off.